ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Mark took over last night. That means I was only woken up twice by itchy boy, but Mark got him to settle down without me and I could go right back to sleep. The luxury of nearly uninterrupted sleep is overwhelming. I was able to flip over when I wanted to, without the little man waking or burrowing his head into my armpit.

You might think it would be impossible to ignore the sounds of your own child crying in the middle of the night. Or whining, fussing, demanding something or someone. Not so. When you are so sleep deprived that your life is painful, you could ignore a simultaneous earthquake, hurricane and tornado.

The little man is in the throes of full blown eczema, likely brought about by spring pollens. Every year of his little life, his skin has been worse in spring and early summer. This year he is considerably less ridden with itchy spots than in past years, so his body is adjusting on its own to his immune intolerance. But too slowly for our sleep not to be interrupted. And his sleep, of course.

Last year he had to wear a sock on his hand from May to July to cover his wound and remind him not to scratch. This year he's affected primarily on the backs of his knees, his face, arms and abdomen. He can't let his knees scab over and heal, so he scratches them raw a few times a day and then can't bend them to walk or play. He's hobbling around like an old man. Every lotion 'tings him, as he will tell you repeatedly, loudly. Even good old lanolin.

Recently, I've been organizing our medical supplies and turning our linen closet into a medicine cabinet, and towel closet. It's really a ridiculous excuse for a linen closet, the shelvsd being less than a foot deep. But it accommodates shoebox sized plastic tubs. We have an entire tub full of all sorts of lotions, creams, medicates salves, prescription and over the counter cures recommended by doctors, eczema suffers, well-meaning friends and family. None of those have worked for this poor child. Most hurt. Some caused a spread of the condition they were trying to alleviate.

We've gone through every known pharmaceutical treatment for eczema, have eliminated more foods from his diet than one would think possible, tried homeopathic treatments, and for the past two years Chinese herbal treatments. These have worked better than anything else, but he is still in pain and itching all the time. The difference is that with the Chinese treatments and Zyrtec, the child understands what it means to be itch free. He has lived a portion of his life now without itching and is really mad that it has returned.

Now that I've slept a bit, I can feel compassion for him again. It has been a difficult, trying past few weeks. I'm horribly unfocused, cranky and intolerance of minor infractions by the children. Today should be a better day. Sleep is a powerful thing.